What is a Collaborative Divorce Coach?
A Collaborative Divorce Coach is a divorce professional with a background in mental health. Your Collaborative Divorce Coach will help you and your spouse recognize, negotiate and communicate your emotional concerns during the divorce process. S/he will help guide you through through the emotional bottlenecks that often slow down progress during a divorce
While your coach may be a therapist, s/he will not act as a therapist for either you or your spouse during your divorce. Coaching is very different than therapy.
Therapy helps you look back at your life and resolve your past emotional wounds.
Divorce coaching is future focused and goal oriented. It emphasizes moving you and your spouse from where you are now to where you want to be.
Divorce Coaching helps you clarify your feelings so that you can participate more constructively in negotiations. It helps you identify and give voice to your needs so that, together with your spouse, you can create a mutually acceptable settlement agreement.
By helping you manage the tricky emotional side of divorce, a divorce coach can help you save time and money. S/he can also help you reduce the hurtful and unproductive emotional struggles that many couples get caught up in when they are going through a divorce.
In sum, your coach can help you think more clearly and navigate through your divorce in a more respectful and constructive manner.
Why Use a Divorce Coach?
Depending upon your needs, you and your spouse may use one neutral divorce coach. Or, you and your spouse may each have your own coach.
Your Collaborative Divorce Coach will help you and your spouse deal with your emotions during the Collaborative Process so that those emotions don’t hijack your divorce. S/he helps you and your spouse express and represent your goals, concerns, and feelings as you craft your financial and parenting agreements.
Your Collaborative Divorce Coach can help you avoid getting stuck in inflexible positions by helping you identify what you really need from their divorce agreements. S/he will redirect you and your spouse from focusing on blame to focusing on solutions.
Your Coach Will:
- Encourage respectful listening
- Help each of you gain perspective on the other’s point of view
- Assist in formulating goals for your individual futures
- Help you gather information about your hopes and goals for your children, and determine what both you and your spouse believe is best for them
- Support you and your spouse in putting your children’s needs ahead of your own
By creating safe, open avenues of communication, a Collaborative Divorce Coach can help you reduce the expense, time and destructiveness of a divorce.